1. Reinventing Jughead…

    So Jughead’s getting an update for the twenty-first century. This implies that there is something wrong with Jughead to begin with.

    Is there?

    Of course there is. Their target demographic is children and he’s a terrible role model. He’s a misogynist. He eats far too much junk food. Doesn’t seem to give much of a shit about anything.

    If he were a real person, someone would have staged an intervention years ago.

    Yet….

    To “fix him” would be to change his defining qualities. (Except the hat; that crown is pure awesome.) He would cease to be Jughead.

    So what are they going to do?

    Unless he finally comes out of closet, I’m at a loss.

    This is not a costume; this is a cocoon. Soon he will emerge a glorious butterfly.

  2. Veronica’s Dollar Bill Dress

    Thanks, riverdalehigh, gold star for you!

    vv

  3. Pump harder!

  4. Archie says the word “butthole!”

     

    A totally in context submission from muzition.

    From The Spartanburg Herald, Apr 2, 1947.

  5. Attempted Murder… IN context. 

    Attempted Murder… IN context.